9023

Joke of the Day

"I used to do drugs i still do, but i used to to. -Mitch rip the legendary Mitch Hedberg"

"You ever watch a really stupid person for like 10 mins and wonder how they haven't been hit by a train or carried off by a giant eagle yet?"

"I like my women how I like my file paper. Ruled, and punched twice near the spine to keep them in line."

"Had a date with a lady I met on Christian Mingle. It was going fine until I told her I was Jewish & her half of the bill was $40 dollars."

"Where do American bees store their honey? In a USBee hive. ~Thank my ten year old for that one."

"Women 15 to 65 At 15, a girl is a SURPRISE. At 25, she is the RIGHT PRIZE. At 35,she is a GRAND PRIZE. At 45,she is a CONSOLATION PRIZE. At 55, she is a DOOR PRIZE, and at 65,she is a GIVEAWAY PRIZE"

"Jason Bateman origin story: On a field trip to a scientific lab as a teen, he was bitten by a radioactive Jason Bate."

"""The last thing I want to do is hurt you. First I want to date you & get to know you."""

"What does it mean when a doctor has both hands on your shoulders? The Prostate exam isn't going he way you expected"

"Looking to find a way to say ""I'm not mad at you"" without actual human communication? Try a Facebook Like today!"