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Joke of the Day

"Jesus and his disciples walk into a restaurant. Jesus: A table for 26, please. Headwaiter: But there's only . . . um, 13 of you. Jesus: Yeah, we're all going to sit on the same side."

Next Joke
 
"Did you here about the guy who's whole left side was cut off? He's all right now."
"Who are the most decent people in the hospital? The ultrasound people.!! lol"
"Why is Quicksilver so fast? Because he's Russian"
"Who makes more money - a drug dealer or a prostitute? The prostitute- she can wash her crack and resell it."
"They canceled school and reminded everyone to ""Prepare for a blackout"" I've got 2 bottles of Vodka and percocet Blackout is *so happening*"
"I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours."
"Really Cosmo? 50 tips on how to make your guy h0rny? What the f^ck are the 49 things after ""touch his p*nis"
"I got a new vacuum that sucks so much, it was directed by M. Night Shamalayan"
"Careers Advisor to American student: ""What do you want to be when you leave college?"" Student: ""Alive""."