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Joke of the Day

"Really Cosmo? 50 tips on how to make your guy h0rny? What the f^ck are the 49 things after ""touch his p*nis"

"Tell me how Dora can be completely bilingual at the age of five, but can't find a stupid apple on a tree behind her?"

"Jim is a butcher. Has a sister named Delores. He stands 6ft tall and wears a 10 gallon hat. What does he weigh? Meat hes a butcher."

"Is cyanide the most efficient way to kill someone? Asking for a fiend."

"Stephen Hawking believes he's solved a huge mystery about black holes ...and he'll keep believing as long as we all play along, ok? He's adorable."

"I want to die like my grandfather, softly in my sleep... ...not screaming in terror like his passengers."

"With his comedy career basically ruined, Bill Cosby can finally pursue another dream of his... ...coaching at Penn State"

"Alcohol is an excellent solvent. It dissolves marriages, friendships and organs."

"The best way to be passive aggressive to a trophy store is to order a ""Worst Trophy Shop"" trophy and then never pick it up."

"What's the hardest part to cook in a vegetable ? The wheelchair"