89019

Joke of the Day

"For the Canadians (Warning: Offensive) How do you kill a fox with one leg? Make him run across Canada."

"gotta ove Valentines Day roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not a good poet, ...you're hot."

"It's a little sad that today's youth don't get to experience a red rubber dodgeball to the face like we did back in the day."

"Chief Exec: Any Ideas? Writer 1: Talking Animals! Writer 2: How about a Princess? Writer 3: Kill the parents! -Brainstorming at Disney"

"You can now take small knives with you on planes, but my 4oz bottle of mouth wash is dangerous. Got it!"

"Hey, dude who's still lighting fireworks at midnight, nobody would notice a couple of gunshots right now."

"Public restrooms are weird. The guy in the stall next to me has four feet and is wearing heels on one pair."

"I accidentally got my blow up doll pregnant. Related: I've got some balloons for sale."

"Did you hear the one where the Scotsman gave his son some money? Neither did I."

"If you're first on a YouTube comment thread, I assume you're last in pretty much everything else."