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Joke of the Day

"Just bought the extended version of The Hobbit. Bilbo is 7' 6"" now."

"Yo momma so fat... ...she's the third rock from the sun!"

"[1773] ""Your majesty, last night some angry colonists dumped our tea into the Boston Harbor"" *three English ladies faint* WTF THIS MEANS WAR"

"Why do Texans duel at high noon? They distrust clocks."

"Quick tax question: Does giving thousands of dollars to charity last year make up for lying about it this year?"

"What shape does a muppet follow when throw through the air? Pa-Ra-Bo-La (do doooo do dodo)"

" All in all, it's just a... nother post on my wall. "

"One thing I don't like about Twitter is that you can read something & think it's funny & only afterward realize it was written by a woman."

"I'll never hire a monkey plumber off Reddit again! I told him my pipes were clogged up, he recommended a banana for scale."

"What is Russia's codename for Trump? Agent Orange."