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Joke of the Day
"A nun was kidnapped No offence but she was asking for it. Nun taken."
Next Joke
"You know how if a bear is about to attack you, you're supposed to stand totally still? Your smarter friend that's running just punkd you."
"I attend weddings purely to be fortunate enough to hear those two little words that always bring tears to my eyes - ""open bar"""
"Q: You know what the problem with political jokes is don't you? A: They get elected."
"I'll be buried in a spring-loaded coffin stuffed w/ tons of confetti. In the future some archeologist is gonna have an awesome day at work."
"The guy who invented paper died last week That's tearable!"
"What's the worst part about being a black Jew? You gotta sit in the back of the oven..."
"Interviewer: ""What did you like best about your last job?"" Me: ""Sometimes, people had birthdays and there was free cake."""
"Sleep is my drug....my bed is my dealer and my alarm clock is the police."
"If my husband doesn't like my cooking, he can buy his meth somewhere else."