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Joke of the Day

"When I found out the murderer dismembered the victim, It really tore me into pieces."

"Son: What is an autobiography? Father: Er the story of an automobile."

"My girlfriend's father asked me what I do... Apparently, ""your daughter"" was not the answer he wanted to hear."

"What did the farmer say when the townspeople told him all of his cows were in town..? I herd."

"What's the difference between a garbanzo pea and a chick pea? I've never had a garbanzo pea on my face."

"If i were a hand model, at least i could say that i've banged a model."

"NSFW What's your most offensive joke? Here's mine. Q: How do you get a retarded girl to swallow? A: Cum on the window and let nature take its course."

"What do you call a story about a rooster? A cocktale."

"For my food service workers out there: How many servers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? That's not my fucking sidework!"

"I always give away all my dead batteries ... ... free of charge."