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Joke of the Day

"What does Michael Jackson have in common with a second place racehorse? They both came in a little behind."

"married sext... him: I'll be home soon her: don't you threaten me"

"Your Honor, for our opening motion in this murder trial, the defense would like to submit, as exhibit A, the victim's ringtone."

"Pussy. That's it. Don't get it? No worries, me either."

"Pretty sure my baby thinks the number after 10 is yay."

"The Class of 2019"

"Whats the only bad thing about head from an anorexic girl? She won't swallow"

"My new years resolution is not to be a dick, you dicks."

"Someone at this party is wearing the same shirt as me. It's very awkward. How did this happen. We barely even fit in this shirt."

"What did the Zune say to the iPod? You da real MP3."