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Joke of the Day

"A man walks into a bar and says, ""David Foster Wallace was not the greatest writer to ever live."" ."

"I hope ""citibank"" is better at math than spelling."

"Any party is an ugly sweater party if you're ugly and you sweat a lot"

"You know what they say about the necronomicon? It's a real cult classic!"

"Did you hear about the time traveler who finished his plate? He went back four seconds."

"A real man will always find time for his woman, even if it means blowing off a date with his mistress."

"Hey, girl. Are you a potato? because I'm about to. Mash. You. Up. Oh. You ARE a potato. And a talking potato at that. My meds aren't working"

"Every chair is a reclining chair when you're drunk."

"Chinese Proverb: Man who run infront of car get tired... Man who run behind car get exhausted"

"What happens when you mock the host of Diners, Drive-In's, and Dives? The guy gets fierious."