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Joke of the Day

"Why did the melons have a big wedding? Well, they cantaloupe"

"Patron: Didn't you tell me the chef here cooked for the late heads of Europe? Waiter: Yes and that's why they are the late heads of Europe."

"Where did little sally go after the explosion? Everywhere"

"I'd rather die than have an egg on my hamburger but to be fair I already sort of wanted to die"

"The Navy should develop something based on ""gaydar"" that would allow ships & planes to recognize approaching objects."

"What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? She Gagged."

"My deaf girlfriend started talkin in her sleep last night Nearly poked my eye out"

"Whats the easiest way to drown a blonde? Glue a penny to the bottom of a swimming pool ALTERNATE ENDING: Put a scratch n' sniff at the bottom of a swimming pool"

"What do you say to someone who doesn't like Rick & Morty? I'm going to need you to take your opinions and put'em wayyy up inside your butthole."

"My wife can suffer in silence louder than anyone I know."