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Joke of the Day

"How do you make a hormone Stamp on her foot"

"Want to hear the worst self-referential joke in the world? You just did!"

"What's the difference between a wedding and a funeral? One less drunk."

"I'm sick and I'm going to work today; so if there's some kind of Contagion-level outbreak, I'm your patient-zero."

"What could have been the most stuppidest result of Napolleonic wars if France won? Tsar Napoleon."

"Prisoner:*strapped into chair* Flip the switch & fry me. Guard: Oh, we're not electrocuting you... *college kid w/ acoustic guitar walks in*"

"Arrogant Co-Worker: Do you have any idea how many years of education I have? Me: Don't feel bad, I got held back a couple of times myself."

"When someone cries, ""No one gets me"" I immediately snatch them and put them in my trunk and yell, ""I got you""!"

"If you are thinking of having an affair, just remember the head of the CIA couldn't even get away"

"A sheep, a drum and a snake fall off a cliff... Ba-dum-tss."