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Joke of the Day
"What do you get if you cross King Kong with a watchdog? A terrified postman."
Next Joke
"I like my coffee like I like my women. Without a dick."
"How do you determine the personality of a hot dog? Give it an Oscar-Myers-Briggs test"
"Why Couldn't Bill Gates Get A Girl Friend? Because his penis was Microsoft."
"This morning someone phoned me and told me that I need to sort my fucking life out. It was quite a wake up call."
"A man stands over the coffin of his deceased wife. ""Her star sign was cancer you know"" he says. "" I guess it's ironic..."" ""That she was killed by a giant crab."""
"You're not truly a parent until you've crawled through the McDonalds urine tubes to pull out a crying child."
"[alarm clock goes off] ok it's happening again it's a day and it's here again *googling* day again why how to unsubscribe days"
"One time I accidentally listened to a John Mayer song & spontaneously generated 2 thumb rings before it was over."
"What do you get if you breed a Green Lantern, a car and an atheist? Willing suspension of disbelief"