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Joke of the Day

"Friday night. Friday night- Cant get fucked- Women are sluts or too stuck up- Cant grab pussy- Cant get head - If it werent for lotion Id shoot myself dead"

"Maybe, just once, someone will call me ma'am without adding, ""You're making a scene"""

"There is a new virus which only affects Muslims.Where do they put the infected? In the Quran-tine room!"

"I peaked too soon in high school. I'm still sending her child support."

"Apparently I took my elderly neighbor's offer to ""come inside"" a bit too far. Anyway, totally in jail."

"Did you hear about the blind man walking past the fishmonger's? ""Hello ladies"""

"WIFE: *filing for divorce* ME: Are you mad at me?"

"I eat cake every day because I know somewhere out there, it's someone's birthday and I need to show respect."

"What is a recently divorced woman's favorite fruit? Mango!"

"With all these new apple devices, what's gonna be next? The iPoor"