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Joke of the Day
"Everybody laughed when I said I wanted to be a comedian Well, nobody's laughing now"
Next Joke
"My girlfriend says that I've got the body of a guy half my age. Which would be a nice compliment if I wasn't 22."
"The next time I hear a racist or sexist joke, I won't stand for it!! I'll sit because it's much more comfortable."
"Last year I felt miserable and depressed, but now I turned that around.. Now I'm depressed and miserable"
"A little girl and a little boy were sitting in a bathtub together.. The little girl looks down and asks, ""can I touch it?"" He answers, ""NO WAY- YOU ALREADY BROKE YOURS OFF!"""
"What do you get if you cross an eel with a shopper? A slippery customer."
"Imagine Putting 5 worth of fuel in your car and your cars like ""well, since we're both being childish"" And refuses to open the door."
"What's the difference between a high-wire circus trapeze act and the Rockettes? One is a fantastic display of cunning stunts while the other is a fantastic display of stunning cunts"
"Where do some popes get their vestments? Urban Outfitters"
"I wish I lived in the 20s so I could wear hats, smoke cigarettes and say stuff like, ""Hey big cheese, this giggle water is the cat's meow."""