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Joke of the Day

"My husband is so weird He always listens to me for an hour and a half, but then he turns off the tv, and leaves, telling me the match ended."

"Judging by his physique, I'd guess Popeye's a pretty accomplished masturbator."

"I have a good joke... My grades."

"Did you know that clumsy people are more likely to be obese? That's because they keep walking into things.........like McDonald's."

"A sheep,a pot and a snake walk together then fall of a cliff... *Baah Dum Tssssss*"

"So my neighbor knocked on my door at 3AM... Who knocks on doors at three in the morning? It's so inconsiderate! Good thing I was still up playing my bagpipes."

"My sex life is like the internet. Full of lies"

"Two antennas get married on a roof... The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was great!"

"FRIEND: What 3 books would you have on a desert island? ME: My first book is more books. F: What? These aren't wish M: Second book's a TV."

"Lesbians build huge mansion in atlanta... It was all tounge and groove, not a single stud in the house. (Construction workers joke, you might not get it)"