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Joke of the Day

"Wanna hear a joke?? Okay here goes, My ex-wife still misses me! BUT HE AIM IS GETTING BETTER! HER AIM IS GETTING BETTER! You see it's funny because marriage is terrible.-Stanley pines 2012"

"Have you ever been on the Nile River? I heard it does on for miles and niles and niles... If you don't believe me, you may be in denial."

"What do you call a guy in a wheelchair? Whatever you like, what's he going to do about it anyway?"

"After hearing Kim and Kanye are having a kid via in vitro fertilization... Of course Kanye picked the option where he could have sex with himself and still have a kid."

"Mom: Some stranger keeps answering your land line. Me: That's because I haven't had a land line in 7 years, Ma."

"Hungary's goalkeeper Gabor Kiraly's sweatpants are looking so sexy that you can go to second round with them."

"So I walked into a pub with some of the lads... Oh wait hang on I don't have a social life."

"Where do milk shakes come from? Nervous cows!"

"What do you call the first black guy elected to the White House? Precedent."

"What did the mexican say to the Highlander? There can only be Juan."