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Joke of the Day

"Give a man fish and you'll feed him for a day...... Give a fish a man and you're probably in the Mafia"

"Norwegian Robot If a Norwegian robot analyzed a bird, then it... Scandinavian"

"I popped into the library this morning and asked if there was any books on Facebook status jokes? The librarian said, ""They've all been stolen."" ""That's the one."" I replied."

"Wife and I taking a shower Wife: I want you to do bad things to me. Me: <pours shampoo in her eyes>"

"You know what they say when you gamble with Chinese food, you dim sum, you lose some."

"News: IKEA pledges 1 billion euros to help slow climate change. But knowing IKEA, it will take forever to put the money together."

"Why didn't Spock do a mind meld with Frodo? Because he figured that would be a bad hobbit to get in to."

"update: the light went out in my fridge so i had to eat everything so it wouldn't get scared"

"Cop- Do you have any drugs in the vehicle? -No, go fish."

"I think having an abortion really brings out the kid in me"