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Joke of the Day

"An undertaker and a snake If an undertaker and a snake got married, what would there towels say? Hissss and Hearse"

"I just finished reading All Quiet on the Western Front... It was quite Remarque-able."

"I want to be a stand-up comedian... But I'm afraid I'll be laughed at."

"What do Bruce Lee and my dick have in common?(NSFW) They both have the 1 inch punch."

"The English language is bizzare There was a young girl from Slough Who choked on a piece of raw dough But the time she was through With hiccup and cough She woke everyone in the borough"

"Say what you want about deaf people"

"Walked past a hero turned to stone I guess the gods took him for granite"

"""I've got 99 problems."" - Walt Disney after only being able to give two Dalmatian puppies away"

"When I was younger I used to think I was a God. Most parents give their kids food, mine gave me burnt offerings."

"Never serve bad food at a bris Otherwise the rabbi won't leave a tip"