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Joke of the Day

"My man wants me to understand him better so I'm not getting my mustache waxed this month."

"A kid asks his dad ""What's worse: ignorance or indifference?"" ""Johnny"", responds his dad, "" I neither know nor care."" Edit: granma grammar."

"If I can eat or drink it in less than two minutes, don't tell me it's 3.5 servings."

"Why was the guitar teacher arrested? Because he fingered a minor."

"Why did the dog die? It had Barkinsons"

"I don't like lollipop ladies... They make me cross."

"How can you get a million dollars in a week? Start with 10 million and become a day-trader."

"Did anyone else go into Monsters, Inc. thinking it was going to be a movie about a really big sink?"

"Boy: Grandma do you know how to croak. Grandma: No I don't think so. Why? Boy: Because Daddy says he'll be a rich man when you do."

"What is it called when one punches a stripper? A hoedown!"