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Joke of the Day
"Who is Shrek's favorite basketball player? Shrekquille O'Neal I'm sorry"
Next Joke
"As I looked at the liposuction tube I realized it could be used to strangle someone... ...making it a weapon of mass reduction."
"My girlfriend has a global map tattooed on her body She may have been a difficult person to deal with. But you always knew where you were with her."
"George Michael was upset to find he had let a chocolate bar melt in his pocket It was just a careless whisper"
"5-year-old: Dad, can you make the rain go away? Me: Someone more powerful than me controls the weather. 5-year-old: Me: 5-year-old: Mom?"
"Told this joke when I was three Me: ""Why did the cow cross the road?"" Parent: ""Wh-"" Me: ""Moo!"""
"Shia Labeouf got rejected for a job he applied for... During a practice run he caused negative results. Apparently he wasn't what the suicide hotline was looking for."
"Why did 5000 Mexicans show up to fight at the Alamo? They only had two cars."
"What kind of bug do you find on a long car ride? An I-shoulda-pede."
"I haven't had bread in 3 weeks. I look great but now all I think about is bread. I'm basically a duck at this point."