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Joke of the Day

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Berlin ! Berlin who ? Berlin maiden over !"

"I just spent 15 minutes searching for my phone in my room, using my phone as a flashlight..."

"wife: ""you promised you wouldnt buy anything stupid with our lottery winnings"" me: [covering penguin's ears] ""he can hear you linda"""

"I'm eating a bottle of glitter so when I get drunk and throw up tonight people will think I'm a unicorn in human form."

"Someone's deodorant is not working... And I know it's not me because I'm not wearing any."

"The guy who developed Fractals.. The guy who developed fractals was Benoit B Mandelbrot, I heard the 'B' stood for 'Benoit B Mandelbrot'"

"What's the worst thing about Jonestown jokes? The punch line."

"Donald Trump went to graduate school and now he has a PuD Pretty 'uge d...isertation"

"Subway must have introduced a new Genius feature, because they just suggested I might like a drink with my sandwich. I do. Nailed it."

"3 potatoes are in a corner. How do you know which one is the prostitute? You look at the one with the sticker that says, I DA HO."