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Joke of the Day

"Logged into FB told Gemma her wedding pics are beautiful. Logged into Twitter to tell you she looked like a fat man in drag and I hate her."

"Whats the antonym of Manchester United? WomanBreastsR Divided"

"Radio One has banned its DJs from playing Madonna songs, saying that at 56 she is old and irrelevant. Yeah, at the BBC they only like them young."

"When is it acceptable to not tip your server? when your a system admin, and your server if tipped could destroy many websites."

"I heard a man at the beach yelling ""I can't swim!"" Well, I can't play the fucking Piano but am I bitching about it? Attention Whore..."

"A bird in the... *BLOCKED* Birds of ... *BLOCKED The early bird catches the wo...*BLOCKED & REPORTED FOR ABUSIVE CONTENT -worms on Twitter"

"A skeleton walks into a bar, he says, ""gimme a beer, and a mop."""

"Q: Why were screams coming from the kitchen? A: The cook was beating the eggs."

"Well, I'm moving to Thailand. There's a small village there named Phucket that really speaks to me on a spiritual level."

"My physics teacher is the chord slope of an a-t curve The average jerk"