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Joke of the Day

"Who needs viagra when there are pictures of old women with dyed orange hair and their eyebrows penciled in on the internet"

"Why didn't the mother splinter call her son on his birth-day? Because he's a little prick!"

"People are far too distrustful of chickens. They can't even cross the road without having their motives questioned."

"Paul Walker had to take some time off from the Fast and Furious series He was burnt out."

"You can't change a person unless they wear adult diapers"

"It's cute the way they make the Oreos bag resealable like I'm not going to eat them all."

"I love wearing ear-buds and listening to the music loud at the gym, because no one can hear you if you fart...Why is everyone looking at me?"

"My girlfriend kept saying she'd hit me if I didn't stop singing Haddaway's What is Love.... I said ""Baby, don't hurt me"""

"I asked my cat ""Who is your favorite President of China?"" According to her it's Mao."

"How did Chuck Norris solve the dwindling oil reserves problem? Ctrl - C, Ctrl - V"