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Joke of the Day
"Pooped without my phone this morning, just like Gandhi."
Next Joke
"You're the she to my nanigans."
"I used to work at an orange juice factory... I got fired cuz I couldn't concentrate"
"Isn't setting your Twitter feed to 'private' kinda like putting a velvet rope in front of an Arby's?"
"Does the five-second rule apply to soup? Please hurry. Edit: Nevermind."
"Another ""Priceless"" joke. Vodka 19.99. Motel room 64.99. Condoms 9.99. Finding out she swallows and likes it in the ass? Priceless! Fuck Mastercard, it pays to Discover"
"What's the most confusing day in Harlem?? Father's Day."
"What's the hardest thing about skateboarding? Telling your parents you're gay."
"Ever been in the middle of writing a great tweet and think, did I just run someone over?"
"What do you call a Black Man flying a Plane? The Pilot you racist fuck."