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Joke of the Day

"Carrots are good for your eyes but they hurt when I put them in."

"WORK TIP: Respond to all your boss's emails with ""Heyyyy you!"""

"If I had a gun and 2 bullets and I was alone in a room with you, Hitler, and Stalin, I'd look at you like how the fuck did we get in this situation."

"My doctor said I should stop thinking so much, it's bad for my health and could damage my liver He also say's I'm half deaf"

"What reddit page has that link/picture you're looking for? The next page."

"What happened to the man who tried to cross a lioin with a goat ? He had to get a new goat !"

"What did Shakespeare say when asked how his wife keeps things interesting? ""Anne hath a way."""

"If you post BDSM jokes on /r/jokes.... Does it count as a submission?"

"WIFE: *filing for divorce* ME: Are you mad at me?"

"Cheating in a joke. A man cheats on his girlfriend Lorraine with a woman named Clearly. Lorraine dies suddenly. At the funeral, the man stands up and sings, ""I can see Clearly now, Lorraine is gone."""