73577

Joke of the Day

"Why do nurses smack newborn babies on the back before handing them over to their parents... To knock the dicks off of the stupid ones"

"*sees a couple of vacuum cleaners making out* ""Ugh, get a Roomba"""

"I'm surprised ""slow internet connection"" doesn't come up more often as a motive in murder trials."

"I don't understand all the excitement over Usain Bolt I finish in under ten seconds all the time."

"Yo mama so tall she tripped in Michigan and hit her head in Florida."

"Did you here the joke about the dead guy? Nevermind, it's time has passed."

"Mexicans are so good at basketball It's in there blood. They can Run, Jump, Shoot and steal."

"My first highschool football game was a lot like my first time having sex... I was bloody and sore by the end, but at least my dad came Repost from r/darkhumour"

"Did you hear about the fool who keeps going round saying ""no""? No. Oh so it's you!"

"Two tachyons are sitting in a gaming cafe when a normal particle walks in. The first tachyon looks over its shoulder and says, ""Fucking causals."""