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Joke of the Day
"Q: What do you call a blonde holding a balloon? A: Siamese twins."
Next Joke
"""Objection your honor, the defense is badg-"" BADGERING THE WITNESS! JINX! You can't talk. *Judge gives a respectful nod* ""Case dismissed."""
"What do you call a smelly man who tells terrible jokes? PUN-GENT"
"When your 3yo spits a chewed up wad of cheese into your hand and you're like ""where did you find this, I didn't give you any cheese today?"""
"Dude in front of me at Starbucks made a big show about calling his Grande a ""medium"" and the barista was like, ""Uck, this again"""
"What's the difference between a dead baby and a dead gorilla? There aren't any dead babies at the Cincinnati Zoo."
"I bet r/clocks is blowing up right now. [x-post from Showerthoughts]"
"It takes a second..... Two guys walk into a bar.... you think the second would have noticed. HA."
"I fart in church so I can sit in my own pew."
"So, I was waiting in line for Pho, and my buddy called me asking where I was. For some reason, he was offended when I said ""Pho Queue."""