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Joke of the Day

"Procrastination Some times I procrastinate so badly on one item of home work that I do other homework to get out of doing that one item"

"a quadruple amputee is waiting at the bus stop.The bus pulls up.Driver says ""alright John how you getting on today?"""

"A worm crawled out from a plate of spaghetti and exclaimed... ""Man, that was one hell of a gangbang!"""

"Hi, what can I get for 25 cents? You can get the fuck out."

"Yesterday I saw a little kid who kept refusing to go home for a nap. He was resisting a rest."

"How many introverts does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Why does it have to be a group activity?!"

"There's been four dudes wandering around our local cemetery all morning. I think they've lost the plot."

"What do you call a nun on a wheelchair Virgin mobile"

"Why is the cinematography of pornos so impressive? Because it's all done one handed."

"Champagne says I'm classy. Vodka says I can do anything I want. My therapist says I have to stop talking to my drinks."