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Joke of the Day

"why are clothes so expensive???? i should not have to pay this much to not be naked. people should pay ME to not be naked"

"How's banging a fat chick like riding a scooter? They're both a lot of fun until your friends catch you."

"How did the pig get to the hospital? in a hambulance."

"What has wheels and is green? Grass, I lied about the wheels."

"How do you keep an imbecile happy all his life ? Tell him a joke when he's a baby !"

"Why did the drill instructor squirt condiments on his trainees in the morning? That's how he mustard the troops."

"NSFW My sister tried pranking me today She tried the ""I'm pregnant"" prank. I didn't fall for it of course, because I know I always use protection."

"The cranberries used to write songs that would get stuck in your head, in your heeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad!"

"a neanderthal scrawls a message on a cave wall, the etchings begin to glow red as he exceeds 140 characters"

"What did the Elk say after leaving a gay bar? I cannot believe I just blew 50 bucks back there!"