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Joke of the Day

"If you get robot arms don't get the cheap ones [starts clapping for no reason]"

"If someone sends you a link to download the Homer's Iliad, don't download it... It's full of trojans!!"

"Told my kid that he had a viral infection and now he's excited because he thinks he's going to be famous online."

"My friend saw Stevie Wonder walking down the street when she went to California! I don't think he saw her though..."

"I'm holding a party for people who can never reach orgasm If you can't come let me know."

"What material is Mario's pants made out of? Denim denim denim."

"I'd rather die than have an egg on my hamburger but to be fair I already sort of wanted to die"

"Obviously the Asian gentleman I saw flush the urinal with a karate kick doesn't mind perpetuating stereotypes."

"What do you call it when you wake up with a boner and wait till you go limp to urinate? Atro-Pee"

"Engineers: ""okay, so we agree the space between the seat and the console will allow people to see what they dropped but never retrieve it"""