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Joke of the Day
"What European capital has the most ghosts? Boodapest!"
Next Joke
"God grant me the dgaf to lol at the things I can't even, the swag to yolo the things I can, and the lifehacks to know the difference"
"why would you steal a baby at least steal something good like a truck or a dolphin"
"An obese old man who breaks into your house at night? A tiny flying woman who buys your dead teeth? It's a wonder children can sleep at all."
"Why do shower heads have 11 holes? Because -(insert group of people associated with the holocaust)- only have 10 fingers."
"Him: If you could have dinner with any people, living or dead, who would you choose? Me: All the dead ones"
"Van Gogh: ""Dude, I saw this hella vase of sunflowers today."" Gauguin: ""Pics, or it didn't happen."" [van gogh pulls out oil paints & easel]"
"I'm in a 12 step program for musical theatre addicts. I'm on step 5, 6, 7, and!"
"Made this up two days ago: What did the French guy say when a bird pooped on him? I have Grey Poupon me"
"I was going to buy a drawbridge But apparently they're let downs."