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Joke of the Day
"What's big, Scottish, and depressing? Scotland."
Next Joke
"My girlfriend asked me to give her 9 inches and make it hurt. So I fucked her 3 times and punched her in the face"
"What is the difference between light and hard? You can sleep with a light on"
"Although it sounds like it could be a good one, Pissflaps is a terrible name for a bar & grill"
"What did the alpacas go as for their group costume? The zombie alpacalypse"
"My mother once told me to get rid of the assholes in my life She then complains that I never contact her."
"Why does it feel like time slows down during the day when you're at work and rapidly speeds up at night when you get home?"
"When is a penis not a penis? When it's a **foot**"
"Q's are just O's that got shanked."
"[gets down on 1 knee] Babe will you-- ""Yeah... Here it is"" [she lends me her phone charger] Thanks"