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Joke of the Day
"The day we decided such footwear would be called ""flip-flops"" was not our most creative moment."
Next Joke
"What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? *gargling noise*"
"FIRED? But I just started! How could I have known we don't do casual Fridays here? Fine. Direct your own goddamn funeral. *flip-flops away*"
"There's a new dating site for bestiality enthusiasts It's called Petfinder.com"
"""I'm sorry"" and ""I apologize"" mean the same thing... except when you're at a funeral."
"I don't want Hillary to become the first f president. Whoops, meant to say female but the ""emale"" got deleted!"
"Seriously considering telling the CDC I have Ebola, so they'll clean my house."
"What do you call a plane on a secret mission? In disguise."
"What did the jewish pedophile say too the children? Would you like to ""buy"" some candy"
"Do men prefer straight or curly hair? Need to know so I can tell my roommate the opposite and then try to steal her boyfriend."