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Joke of the Day

"My walk of shame is every time I leave a girl's house after watching ""How I Met Your Mother"" with her."

"[tries to eject CD 5 mins into space mission] Houston we have a problem I KNOW U CHEATED W/MY WIFE TOM ENJOY 12 YRS OF SMASH MOUTH U PRICK"

"R2-D2 was the most vulgar movie character of all time... They bleeped out every word he said!"

"I hesitate to make fun of ""Canadian bacon,"" because I know they'll eventually play the ""American cheese"" card."

"Happy 2011! I can't wait for Internet Explorer 9."

"What did Jesus say at the last supper? You guys wanna take a picture? Ok come over to this side of the table."

"Why did everyone hate the shoe company? It had no soul."

"Why does the Trump campaign hire people in groups of three? One who can read, one who can write, and one to keep an eye on the other two ""elitist intellectuals."""

"Omg I'm so thirsty- *Kool-Aid Man busts through wall* OH YEAHH *Sugar-free zero calorie Kool-Aid Man jiggles door handle* LITTLE HELP HERE"

"How do you find the blind guy at a nudist colony? It ain't hard."