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Joke of the Day

"What is Michal Jackson A Chocolate Cracker (if they exist)"

"My mother is like cloud storage. Everyone shares her and i have no idea where she's located. Ps: I don't know if i phrased everything correctly."

"What do you call a court case in which an immigrant is suing over sexual harassment? *Alien v. Predator*"

"Life is like a box of chocolates If you're fat it's not going to last long."

"How to celebrate 4/20 Guide your newborn son into becoming an evil dictator and slaughter most of the Jewish population."

"Fun prank: tell your kid World War II ended by the Americans dropping an F-bomb on Japan. Then later when his teacher calls, act shocked."

"It really bothers me when the free Internet that I'm leeching off from the cafe across the street is kind of slow."

"Me: Can I buy that chandelier? Store guy: Of course. Are you putting it up yourself? Me: No, I'm hanging it from the ceiling."

"What is French Super Mario's favorite board game? Le Ouija"

"I hate broken down white cars on the side of the hwy. They look just like cops when I'm speeding & shitting my pants is getting really old."