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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear the one about three Scotsmen who walk out of a bar? It could happen.."

"After 15 years, I finally met my dad. He's a pharmacist."

"My Saturday was going pretty well... Until I realised it was Sunday"

"What is a vampires favourite type of ship? A blood vessel."

"I stopped using Hotmail, it's not for me. I'd rather have an average mail with a pleasant sense of humor and a fulfilling career."

"What can you use to fill your butt crack? Ass-fault"

"Why was the piano teacher arrested? He kept fingering A minor."

"Quick question: can I breastfeed if I've had implants?"

"I sit in the corner eating my tortillas completely confused by this salsa class."

"I want to sleep my way to the top. Like with actual sleep. Wake me when I've conquered."