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Joke of the Day

"How do you stop rape? **NSFW** Consent."

"My wives going to a fancy dress party tonight dressed as a Rastafarian. She wants me to do her hair. I'm dreading it!"

"I can always tell what my present is off Iggy Azelea because she's really bad at wrapping."

"The most beautiful makeup of a woman is passion. But cosmetics are easier to buy."

"If we could master the look dogs have when we're eating in front of them, we'd be able to have sex with any woman at will."

"I'd run way more miles a day if someone holding a bagel was running in front of me and someone holding a spider was chasing after me."

"Him: It should be illegal for white people to wear dreads. Me: Are you Italian, my brother? Him: No. Me: Then no more pizza for you."

"What do you call a chicken with lettuce in its eye? Chicken Caesar Salad"

"ME: ""This might be a dumb question..."" SCIENTIST: ""There's no such thing as dumb que--"" ME: ""Am I a dragon?"""

"What did O say to Q? Ya dick is hangin out."