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Joke of the Day
"My boss asked if I accomplished my years resolution Nope, I'm still working here"
Next Joke
"What do you call a cow with no sense of humor? Moody."
"I'm glad to see you're not letting your education get in the way of your ignorance."
"Dad- I want you to have everything in this world that your heart desires. *Can I have oreos?* [NO]"
"This guy's all like ""I think you've had enough beers for one night."" Then I'm all ""Fuck you, fridge. Appliances can't even talk."""
"What did 0 say to 1? You're turning me on"
"While texting a girl she told me ""I'm board"" so I stopped seeing her. I wasn't offended. I just don't date wood. Or people who can't spell."
"my car's fuel economy is not doing so good... as a matter of fact, it's tanking"
"So I Live In Florida And Wanna Be A Male Stripper... I heard Orlando's nightclub loves people that aim to make their audience drop dead"
"Uhm, excuse me waiter... I'd like to return my food. It only received 5 likes on Instagram."