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Joke of the Day

"i tried to share a hilarious pun with my kids but they had turned on dadblock plus"

"She threw her vibrator on the subway tracks... It didn't work; the train didn't come any faster."

"Bricks and mortar are so passe. I going to live in my homepage."

"Man, Lord of the Rings has all kinds of people! White men, white elves, white dwarves, white trees, Gandalf the white, all the kinds!"

"Where do astronauts leave their spaceships ? At parking meteors !"

"People the most gentle, loving, kind, sympathetic, peaceful and caring creatures in the world. Especially when they need something from you."

"Just made this up, probably not as funny as I think it is. What do you call a dozen birds making a rooster? A twelve finch cock!"

"Did you hear about the 100lb midget with the 50lb balls? He was half nuts."

"I think my wife is overdoing her lent observance. She won't even toss my salad."

"People who argue Hillary is crooked; boy have I got news for you on the rest of the government"