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Joke of the Day

"Trick or treat.. Smell my feet, give me something good to eat. If you don't, I don't care, I'll pull down your underwear. And that's why I was arrested, Your Honor."

"I honestly have no idea how I stopped petting the first dog I ever pet."

"What do you think goes through a spiders mind when you hit it with a hammer? His ass."

"This is blatant click bait... come on, turn this purple, I know you want to..."

"I've just started my own company called Flying Fuck Airlines. Judging from what I've seen here, it's going to be an outstanding success."

"If owls are so wise why are they always eating rodents instead of pizza rolls?"

"Abortion jokes They really suck the life out of you"

"I visited my doctor last week, and he told me I had to stop masturbating. I asked him why, surely it's not dangerous. He said it was distracting him."

"I accidentally fell off a 50-foot ladder but good thing I was only on the 3rd step"

"Helen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it ""HERGGEHRHEHAIOUIGSGEG!"""