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Joke of the Day

"How is the RNC going to wash themselves of the reputation Trump has given them? Lather, Reince, repeat."

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"What do you call a Christian who visits shrines? A roamin' Catholic."
"-911 what's your emergency? -People are pronouncing it EX-presso."
"I'm a virgin but I have sex sometimes"
"What do Monica Lewinsky and a soda machine have in common? They both say insert bill here"
"Q: What is the difference between an UNDERWEAR & a STAGE CURTAIN? A: When you pull down the STAGE CURTAIN, the show is over, but when you pull down the UNDERWEAR..... it's SHOWTIME!!!"
"If by high maintenance you mean she looks like a stoned janitor, then yeah, she's high maintenance."
"Penis nicknames My ex-girlfriend nicknamed my penis after her favorite rapper, Biggie. So I nicknamed her boobs after my favourite country band, Rascal Flatts."
"Looking for a +1 for my wedding."
"How many Vietnam Vets will it take to change a ligh...nevermind, man! You wouldn't understand cuz you weren't there, man!"
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