60145

Joke of the Day

"I woke up, after a drunken night, with two tattoos on my dick, but one of them was done in regular pen ink. So I rubbed one out."

"What nationality is Santa Claus? North Polish"

"If I was one of the seven dwarfs I'd be Nopey."

"Being rich is like being pregnant Everyone is happy for you, but no one asks how many times you were screwed to get there."

"""Do NOT wake her up! It took me thirty minutes to get her to shut up and go to sleep."" -Conversation I just had about a damn Furby."

"Your voice reminds me of a fart. It smells and nobody likes it."

"What do fat girls and mopeds have in common? They're both fun to ride, until your friends find out."

"Last chance to use the washroom before I shower! Speak now or forever hold your pees."

"I try to have garage sales but as soon as anyone shows a slight interest in something I take it back into the house & look at it with pride."

"RRH: Grandma, what big eyes you have. And what big ears you have. And what big TEETH you have! Grandma: You're my least favorite grandchild"