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Joke of the Day

"My dad was fired from his job in road work for theft... I didn't believe it at first. But when I got home, all the signs were there."

"Midget wrestling... ...seems like it would be a pretty short career."

"Do you guys know the story of Flip Flap the Giraffe? It's a giraffe, walking in the savannah. All of a sudden, an helicopter comes by and..... flip flap the giraffe!"

"What do you call a quadriplegic in the ocean? Bob..."

"Why don't snakes have balls? Because hardly any of them know how to dance."

"Whats the best part about dating a Black girl? You don't have to worry about meeting her Father"

"Boss: Can you look this up? Me: (munching on donut) Internet's closed. Boss: Oh. Me: Yeah, I think they're vacuuming it or something."

"I asked God for a car, but I know God doesn't work that way... So, I stole a car and asked for forgiveness."

"What happened to the number 10? It got stuck in 9/11"

"When the internet is down I turn my bed into a make-believe boat and play Life of Pi with the cat"