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Joke of the Day

"Hillary Clinton is gonna be our first f president Oops, someone deleted the emale"

"How to get the attention of a crew of bricklayers... Yell ""Eh, Tony!"""

"Until I had kids I didn't realize that ""bouncing off the walls"" was actually a literal statement."

"Nuts I like: -Cashew. -Almond. -Pistachio. Nuts I don't like: -Hairy. -Religious."

"Joke from my jazz history class: You are stuck on an island with Hitler, Stalin, and Kenny G. You have a gun, but you only have two bullets. What do you do? You shoot Kenny G. Twice."

"What are some of the best comments on threads? [deleted]"

"Did you know that jewish people have a higher risk of getting a cavity? There saliva can be very Hassidic."

"What's the difference between a redditor and a dead baby? The redditor never gets gold"

"Can you see? I hate it when people ask what I will be doing in 5 years time? Sorry I just don't have 2020 vision"

"Was told to turn on the water hose I was told to turn on the water hose. Responded ""I don't know anything about mermaid sexuality"""