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Joke of the Day

"What's the definition of a gentleman? Someone who knows how to play the bagpipe and doesn't."

"I was walking thru the graveyard the other morning... Saw a guy kneeling behind a headstone. I walked up to him and greeted him ""Morning!"" He replied, ""Nah, I'm just taking a shit"""

"I've been married to my wife for 34 years. We now only have hallway sex... When you pass each other in the hallway and both just say ""Fuck You"""

"Why did the chicken cross the road? Friend 1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Friend 2: To get to the idiot's house. Friend 1: Knock knock Friend 2: Who's there? Friend 1: The chicken"

"Where do you take a sick horse? To the Horspital!"

"Girls on dating apps get bombarded with too many lame and boring messages For them, finding the good ones is like finding a needle in a hey-stack."

"A woman just asked me if I'd like to help fight bigotry today but she was holding a clipboard so I said no."

"So a Jew, a blonde, and a Narcissistic billionaire walks into a bar... Then the bartender says: These presidental elections are starting to seem like a joke."

"Have you heard of airplane skirts? They're so short, you can see the cockpit."

"What is worse than being kidnapped by the Talibans? Being rescued by the Americans"