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Joke of the Day

"What type of rock is this Holmes? It's sedimentary my dear Watson!"

"acquaintances (tv show, sitcom): six peopel avoid grabbing a cup of coffee together for 10 years"

"Adult me is pretty pissed that you can't learn to dance perfectly in the span of an 80's montage."

"My 1 year old doesn't laugh when I fart. I can only hope his sense of humor grows more sophisticated with time..."

"You can find me in the club, eatin' Cap'n Crunch I'm into having snacks, I ain't into making lunch"

"I am a Buddhist atheist, I hope I'm reincarnated as a atheist Buddhist."

"Marvin Gaye's Last Day on Earth Marvin (holding present): Happy Birthday Dad!!! Dad: Marvin, if this is another tie, I'm gonna kill you."

"Heard about the statistician who liked to kick back with his feet in the oven and his head on a bucket of ice? On the average, he was quite comfortable."

"Sometimes I get scared robots are going to take over. Then I use a motion-controlled sink."

"A boy is walking in the forest with a pedophile ""This forest is really scary,"" says the boy. ""Tell me about it,"" replies the pedophile. ""And I have to walk outta here alone!"""