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Joke of the Day
"The bartender poured me a scotch and asked me what I thought of it. I told her it was neat."
Next Joke
"I love drinking games.... except the one where you have to try to walk a straight line while saying the ABCs backwards"
"Dear Alcohol, we had a deal. u were suppose 2 make me funnier, smarter & put me in a good mood.... I saw the photos - we need to talk."
"How do you hide an elephant up a cheery tree? Put it in the tree and paint it's balls red. What's the loudest noise in the world? A giraffe eating cherries Edit: not a cheery tree...cherry"
"69 Position I asked my grandma if she had ever tried 69. She said, ""No, but I have done 53 -- that's all the sailors I could screw in one night."""
"There are two types of people in this world. And I hate them."
"Even though I'm a guy I still get nervous when I pee on a pregnancy test."
"What do you call on-again off-again snow in Michigan? Inter-mitten."
"How do you kill a vegan vampire? Steak to the heart."
"What's a karate experts favourite beverage? kar-a-TEA HA"