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Joke of the Day

"Batman stands high on a ledge over Gotham... ""This is high. How did I get up here again? This is fun, I'm fun. I'm dressed up like a bat."""

"I found a lamp in a back alley When I rubbed it the genie said 'You may have a long memory, or a long penis' I forget my response"

"I asked my trainer ""Which machine at the gym should I use to impress beautiful women?"" He pointed outside and said ""The ATM machine"" [ c/o /u/jubileo5 ]"

"Two Polish parents are sitting at the dinner table with their two kids... The father turns to the mother and says ""Why don't we send the kids out to P-L-A-Y, so we can fuck"""

"Did you hear about the patriotic zombie who wanted to serve his country? He joined the Marine Corpse."

"What the best way to cut down a tree? A Suhhh Dude"

"How do you start a rave in Ethiopia? Nail a piece of toast to the ceiling."

"What do you get when you put human DNA into a donkey? North West."

"The punchline came early What does this joke have in common with me the first time I had sex?"

"I had a dream I was going to the zoo to throw poop at the monkeys. No, not my own poop, thats just gross. Poop I found on the way to zoo."