56096

Joke of the Day

"So when a cat pounces on a stranger's lap and demands tickles it's ""cute"" but when I do it I'm ""causing trouble in Starbucks"" again. Jeez!"

"Did you hear about the blonde who after watching the ballerinas wondered why they didn't get taller girls?"

"Why did the teacher cross her eyes? Because she couldn't control her pupils."

"A simpler, more believable theory is that all the dinosaurs got married and just quit having sex all together."

"How come the government can keep printing money But when I do it, it's a crime?"

"A Mexican, a Jew, and a Italian walk into a bar..... The bartender looks up with a scowl and says..... Get the fuck out of here..."

"Little did he know that his foot powered filing system would have made him billions if he had only thought of a better name - The Ped-o-file"

"It's always funny when the flight attendant says ""we know you have a choice of airlines"" as if free will exists."

"I don't know where you got your face from but i hope you have the receipt."

"Be alert The world needs more lerts."