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Joke of the Day

"Listen to Mom! Jim: Sometimes I wish I had listened to my mother's advice. Jon: What did she say? Jim: I dunno. I never listened!"

Next Joke
 
"Tom Clancy passed away today Now he'll be Rainbow 6 feet deep."
"Did you hear about the latest innovation in french tanks? Rear view mirrors so they can see the battles going on."
"Why Does Jesus suck at hockey? He's always getting nailed to the boards."
"Barksy, it's like Banksy, but he's a dog. Now I just sit back and watch the retweets roll in."
"Thank you 2015 for... Bees?"
"My alarm clock is clearly jealous of my amazing relationship with my bed."
"OMG you guys. I just got asked out. By a real live guy. I don't know what to do!? Play dead? Duck and roll? I'm so confused!!"
"I went to the doctor the other day wearing nothing but clingfilm ....... I sat down, the doctor turned and looked at me to say ""Clearly I can see your nuts!"""
"So I got a vasectomy today... Doctor walks in and says: ""you're in good hands, I've altered more balls than Tom Brady"""